I can't even begin to express my excitement over 2010 beginning. I don't know that I've ever embraced the turning of a new year as much as I do this year. As I sit and look back over the last ten years, I feel pretty good about how things have been. I've really grown up over the last decade, going from my teenage high school years to a twenty-something on the closer side of 30. I've had the biggest joys and biggest heartbreaks of my life and am proud to say that on the other side of it, I am a much stronger & better person than I was in the year 2000.
The only resolution I care to make this year is to love stronger, pray more, and continue to enjoy and embrace the little things that make life so special. I'm emotionally overwhelmed by the things to come this year as I become a mother. There are a few things I'd like to document that I want LBC to know about someday when he is older to understand, so I thought I'd share them here:
1) I hope you always know that there has never been a moment when I wasn't full of such abundant joy over being your mom - and that from the moment I found out you were growing inside of me, I have loved you to the depths of my soul.
2) That I love and respect your father more than any other person in my life. He has shown me what true love is, and is my best friend. Our love has grown even stronger since creating you - and when you join us in this world, you will complete the family that our love has created.
3) That it's ok to be scared of what life has in store for you - we walk blindly everyday not knowing what will happen next, but we get our light to see through it all from our faith, our family and our friends.
4) One of the biggest things I want for you to know is that you have an Aunt Jessie in heaven who watches over you every single day since you were conceived. My heart will feel somewhat broken everyday of your life that you will never have the true honor of knowing her because I know that she would have loved you like her own. I had so many conversations with her growing up where we talked about what you would be like, and how much we would love you. I promise to tell you all about her, to keep a piece of her with me that I can hold onto and share with you. I also promise to teach you how to truly love your siblings when our family grows someday - it is one of the most important relationships you will have in your lifetime.
I think 2010 is going to be a fabulous year...I can't wait for every moment. Happy New Year!
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